#um

I need you to go talk to a girl who may have some information about Emma." "Where is she?" "Someplace you're not going to want to go." (...) "I give up. Where?" "Institution 37." I felt a hitch in my breathing. I leaned back against the wall. "Could I pick hell instead? ↗

— Lissa Price

#humor

...quantum mechanics—the physics of our world—requires that you hold such pedestrian complaints in abeyance. ↗

— Brian Greene

#physics #quantum-mechanics #science #humor

No," I said finally. "Slowness in Answering," she said into the handheld. "When's the last time you slept?" "1940" I said promptly, which is the problem with Quickness in Answering. ↗

— Connie Willis

#humor

I’m sure I have no idea what you are talking about PRINCESS.” He tilted his head and half curtseyed when he said the last word. “That! That is what I am talking about. Since we ran into the others you have been cold and more arrogant than usual.” She kept her voice low so the others would not hear. “Is that so? I would say I was averagely arrogant ↗

— B.C. Morin

#sarcasm #sarcasm-humor #humor

Staring into the dragon's maw, one quickly learns wisdom. ↗

— Steven Brust

#humor

True heroics must be carefully planned - and strenuously avoided. ↗

— Steven Brust

#taltos #vlad #humor

I saved a man's life once," said Granny. "Special medicine, twice a day. Boiled water with a bit of berry juice in it. Told him I'd bought it from the dwarves. That's the biggest part of doct'rin, really. Most people'll get over most things if they put their minds to it, you just have to give them an interest. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#healthy #humor #medicine #equality

Don't beat yourself up," said Charlotte. "True love can be so easily mistaken for other things-friendship, humane concern, indigestion... ↗

— Shannon Hale

#love #friendship

One might be led to suspect that there were all sorts of things going on in the Universe which he or she did not thoroughly understand. ↗

— Kurt Vonnegut

#humor #sarcastic-humor #satire #humor

What were you chanting when you gave me your blood?” “More of my vampire magic. I cast a healing spell to aid the powers of my blood.” She sniffled, her nose stuffy. “It was better than Vicodin.” “Vicodin?” “A painkiller from my world.” “A killer of pain. Did you love him?” The words were growled.A burst of unexpected humor gave her strength. “No. In fact, he was hard to shake. He, uh, stalked me, that kind of thing. I had to pretend he didn’t exist.” Nicolai kissed her temple and relaxed against her. ↗

— Gena Showalter

#humor #romance #humor