#us

People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them. ↗

— Dave Barry

#never #people #religious #religious views #share

If God had wanted us to be concerned for the plight of the toads, he would have made them cute and furry. ↗

— Dave Barry

#cute #furry #god #had #made

If you have a big enough dictionary, just about everything is a word. ↗

— Dave Barry

#big #big enough #dictionary #enough #everything

I listen like mad to any conversation taking place next to me just trying to hear why this is funny. Women's restrooms are especially great. I wash my hands twice waiting for people to come in and start talking. ↗

— Lynda Barry

#come #conversation #especially #funny #great

It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare. ↗

— Mark Twain

#courage #curious #moral #moral courage #physical

Remember how you used to be able to feel your bed breathing and the walls spinning when you were a kid? ↗

— Lynda Barry

#bed #breathing #feel #how #kid

There was a beautiful time in the beginning when I just did it and didn't analyze the consequences, but I think that time ends in everyone's work. ↗

— Lynda Barry

#beautiful #beginning #consequences #did #ends

I had some friends that tried it down there, and I went to a couple of open mics, and I just kind of got this... this sick urge to try it instead of just watching it. ↗

— Todd Barry

#down #friends #got #had #i

I must have done everything I had. You go through years where you go through everything you've ever written. ↗

— Todd Barry

#ever #everything #go #had #i

Why is it that we rejoice at a birth and grieve at a funeral? It is because we are not the person involved. ↗

— Mark Twain

#birth #funeral #grieve #involved #person