#z

Don't gobblefunk around with words. ↗

— Roald Dahl

#funny #words #funny

Jazz isn't dead. It just smells funny. ↗

— Frank Zappa

#music #funny

Sane is boring. ↗

— R.A. Salvatore

#crazy #forgotten-realms #funny #humor #jarlaxle

This is Leo. I'm the... What's my title? Am I like, admiral, or captain, or..." "Repair boy." "Very funny, Piper. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#leo-valdez #piper-mclean #funny

She says he says, but she could be lying to me, and he could be lying to her, so I can’t believe her, even if I could believe her.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#believe #bizarre #funny #honest #honesty

They call me, The Sharkalator ↗

— James Patterson

#funny #gazzy #maximum-ride #name-calling #nicknames

Treat your men as you would your own beloved sons. And they will follow you into the deepest valley. ↗

— Sun Tzu

#sun-tzu #art

I might appear confident and chatty, but I spend most of my time laughing at jokes I don't find funny, saying things I don't really mean - because at the end of the day that's what we're all trying to do: fit in, one way or another, desperately trying to pretend we're all the same. ↗

— Tabitha Suzuma

#forbidden #love #pretention #tabitha-suzuma #funny

I want to mail my mailman something. He always brings me mail, yet I never give him any mail. Maybe he will appreciate the thought, or maybe he will feel I am making more work for him. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#considerate #funny #humor #jarod-kintz #mail

Dude. Hot Bozo. Best nickname ever. ↗

— Cynthia Hand

#cynthia-hand #funny #unearthly #funny