When a society abandons its ideals just because most people can't live up to them, behavior gets very ugly indeed.

In the column Judith Martin answers etiquette questions contributed by her readers and writes short essays on problems of manners or clarifies the essential qualities of politeness.

Judith Martin (née Perlman born September 13 1938) better known by the pen name Miss Manners is an American journalist author and etiquette authority.