What are you doing here, anyway? You don’t strike me as the speed dating type.’ ‘I lost a bet with Alfie,’ he says. ‘You met him at The Cow that day . . .?’ Waistcoat Guy, I think, nodding. ‘I said to him that if you didn’t text me back then I’d try speed dating, because I’m officially the worst single man in London.’ ‘You’re not!’ I say. ‘I mean, it wasn’t a bad date. I was just . . .’ ‘Don’t say you were drunk! It’s the biggest post-sex insult ever.’ ‘. . . drunk, I mean drinking, a bit more than I ought, and I was, uh, cringing at the thought that I’d been a nightmare date.’ ‘No. You were great,’ says Mark/Skinny Jeans. ‘Actually, the biggest post-sex insult is “we did?”’ says Robert. ‘But that’s another story.

— Gemma Burgess

#robert-on-the-phone #speed-dating #dating