#drunk

A fuel pump is a fountain drink machine for cars. And people who want to save the environment and get drunk and run to work.
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— Jarod Kintz

#drunk #environment #fuel #gas #gasoline

What's so unpleasant about being drunk?" "Ask a glass of water! ↗

— Douglas Adams

#humour #jokes #humour

[Alcohol] not only replaces positive actions which would address the root causes of our despondency – it prevents them, as more energy becomes focused on achieving and recovering from the drunken state. ↗

— CrimethInc.

#alcohol #drunkenness #anarchy

One more drink and I'll be under the host. ↗

— Mae West

#drinking #drunkenness #drinking

Yes, madam, I am drunk. But in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly.
 ↗

— Winston Churchill

#drunkenness #retort #classics

I mean, that's at least in part why I ingested chemical waste - it was a kind of desire to abbreviate myself. To present the CliffNotes of the emotional me, as opposed to the twelve-column read. I used to refer to my drug use as putting the monster in the box. I wanted to be less, so I took more - simple as that. Anyway, I eventually decided that the reason Dr. Stone had told me I was hypomanic was that he wanted to put me on medication instead of actually treating me. So I did the only rational thing I could do in the face of such as insult - I stopped talking to Stone, flew back to New York, and married Paul Simon a week later. ↗

— Carrie Fisher

#alcoholism #bipolar #celebrities #celebrity #drinking

Do It Under the Influence Yourself! That's what we're shooting for! Get drunk and make your dreams come true. ↗

— Aziz Ansari

#dreams #drunk #get #influence #make

It is best to rise from life as from a banquet, neither thirsty nor drunken. ↗

— Aristotle

#best #drunken #life #neither #nor

The fact that a player is very short of time is, to my mind, as little to be considered an excuse as, for instance, the statement of the law-breaker that he was drunk at the time he committed the crime. ↗

— Alexander Alekhine

#considered #crime #drunk #excuse #fact

Writing a novel is one of those modern rites of passage, I think, that lead us from an innocent world of contentment, drunkenness, and good humor, to a state of chronic edginess and the perpetual scanning of bank statements. ↗

— J. G. Ballard

#chronic #contentment #drunkenness #good #humor