#hum

Very conscious of the fact that an effort was being made to destroy my mind, because I was deprived of books, deprived of any means of writing, deprived of human companionship. You never know how much you need it until you're deprived of it. ↗

— Wole Soyinka

#because #being #books #companionship #conscious

You can’t really yell at your boyfriend for stealing your seat and your best friend. You also can’t yell at your best friend for stealing your boyfriend. Or you can…but Hi seemed like a much easier way to start the morning. ↗

— Ally Carter

#humor #life-lessons #friendship

Jocks usually aren't smart. Their muscles feast on their brains. ↗

— Katie McGarry

#humor #jocks #humor

What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bees and he told me about the butcher and my wife. ↗

— Rodney Dangerfield

#humour #infidelity #parenthood #parenting #sexuality

It's funny how humans can wrap their mind around things and fit them into their version of reality. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#humans #mankind #reality #funny

Headline?" he asked. "'Swing Set Needs Home,'" I said. "'Desperately Lonely Swing Set Needs Loving Home,'" he said. "'Lonely, Vaguely Pedophilic Swing Set Seeks the Butts of Children,'" I said. ↗

— John Green

#humor #humour #internet #john-green #pedophile

You can’t put a price tag on love. But if you could, I’d wait for it to go on sale. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#humor #love #price #sale #funny

She said this in the same way you might say Fields of Punishment or Hades's gym shorts. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#humor #funny

Jazz isn't dead. It just smells funny. ↗

— Frank Zappa

#music #funny

Books can also provoke emotions. And emotions sometimes are even more troublesome than ideas. Emotions have led people to do all sorts of things they later regret-like, oh, throwing a book at someone else. ↗

— Pseudonymous Bosch

#emotions #funny #humor #manga #provoke