#humor

I gave my artistic laugh and also threw in some quirky language for good measure. "Lawks-a-mercy, no! I'm going to have a long bath and..." I looked shyly down. Which is pretty impressive to have done artistic laugh, quirky language and shyness all in the space of ten seconds. ↗

— Louise Rennison

#humor

And a secret inward voice in my head was saying (in a strange breathy voice...) Yes, yessss, I will pop round to The Blind Pig. I will 'pop' round because guess who lives at the Blind Pig? It is not a blind pig, it is Alex. ↗

— Louise Rennison

#humor

A lady doctor in the foreground, black horn-rims and white lab coat, suddenly cried, “You people ought to be ashamed of yourselves! Do you realize what you're doing to the reality concepts we're trying to instill in these people? How do you expect them to differentiate between illusion and reality when you do something like this?” ↗

— Donald E. Westlake

#humor

If you meet an angel, you will have not peace, but a fever. ↗

— Stefano Benni

#fever #humor #peace #humor

When you by nature subscribe to the view that everyone except yourself is a berk or a wanker, it is hard to bond with anybody in any rational common cause. ↗

— Lynne Truss

#humor

You sound so reasonable for a man who's been jilted. Can't you sound a bit angry? You just lost the best sex of your life. Punch a wall or something! ↗

— Bronwyn Scott

#hurt #romance #humor

I'm the first to admit that I don't write right. Now, relax and enjoy the show! The sideshow, that is. ↗

— Lori R. Lopez

#books #eccentric #humor #offbeat #quirky

Only someone you know is going to assume you know them by saying 'it's me.' It's strangers who use names, since they know you don't know who they are." I'm terrified to think that that almost made sense. ↗

— Tara K. Harper

#humor

There are 2,500 kinds of sponges, all of them consist largely of holes. ↗

— Will Cuppy

#humor #zoology #humor

I can think of only one good solution to this dilemma," Diego said, having spent the entire night developing a plan. You sneak into the school and carry her off?" Gaspar quipped. That is the not-so-good solution. And it would be very difficult to sneak into a house full of women without raising an alarm." A cloud descended on Gaspar's brow. "I was not serious. Kidnapping is not a choice. ↗

— Sabrina Jeffries

#kidnapping #romance #humor