#humor

There's no half-singing in the shower, you're either a rock star or an opera diva ↗

— Josh Groban

#humor

It is the iron." Grimalkin picked his way over a puddle, then leaped atop a fallen tree, shaking out his paws."This close to the false king's realm, his influence is stronger that ever. It will be worse once you are actually within its borders." Puck snorted."Doesn't seem like it's affecting you much, Cat." That is because I am smarter than you and prepare for these things." "Really? How would you prepare for me tossing you into a lake? ↗

— Julie Kagawa

#humor #puck #humor

Every ounce of my cynicism is supported by historical precedent. ↗

— Glen Cook

#humor #life #humor

Always watch where you are going. Otherwise, you may step on a piece of the Forest that was left out by mistake. ↗

— A.A. Milne

#humor

And so the dentist says 'Rinse.' So you lean over, and you're lookin' at this miniature toilet bowl. ↗

— Bill Cosby

#humor

Percy?" Annabeth gripped his arm. "Oh, bad," he muttered. "Bad. Bad." He looked across the table at Frank and Hazel. "You guys remember Polybotes?" "The giant who invaded Camp Jupiter," Hazel said. "The anti-Poseidon you whacked in the head with a Terminus statue. Yes, I think I remember ↗

— Rick Riordan

#camp-jupiter #hazel-levesque #heroes-of-olympus #humor #percy-jackson

EVERYTHING NOT FORBIDDEN IS COMPULSORY ↗

— T.H. White

#government #humor #totalitarianism #humor

She led the way. Eyeless sockets of the dead seemed to stare at them as they passed. "These are cool," Dan decided. "Maybe I could-" "No, Dan," Amy said. "You can't collect human bones." "Awww. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#bones #collect #dan-cahill #humor #humor

Georgie, stop trying to resurrect the shoes. They were never alive in the first place. ↗

— Ilona Andrews

#ilona-andrews #kids #on-the-edge #humor

Down in the water, Octavian yelled, “Get me out of here! I’ll kill you!” “Tempting,” Percy called down. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#humor #octavian #percy-jackson #percy-jackson-and-the-olympians #the-mark-of-athena