#humor

It's important to think. It's what separates us from lentils. (The Fisher King) ↗

— Jack Lucas

#humor

When you're writing what you love, it's the most fun you can have with your clothing still on, unless of course, you write naked. ↗

— Don Roff

#humor #writing #funny

I am a conservative. It’s like being a preservative, but with a backwards shelf life. I conserve the values of the past, and I keep them there so I can behave liberally now . ↗

— Bauvard

#funny #humor #liberal #funny

.. a simile is not a lie, unless it is a bad simile. ↗

— Mark Haddon (Author)

#rhetoric #simile #humor

Bertrand Russell declared that, in case he met God, he would say to Him, "Sir, you did not give us enough information." I would add to that, "All the same, Sir, I'm not persuaded that we did the best we could with the information we had. Toward the end there, anyway, we had tons of information. ↗

— Kurt Vonnegut

#freethinker #humor #skeptic #humor

Gerald's look assured her that he and the others would be as near angels as children could be without ceasing to be human. ↗

— E. Nesbit

#humor #phonies #humor

I'm married. And pregnant. ↗

— Edan Lepucki

#impromptu-humor #marriage #what-the-hell #humor

You know, he doesn't have to be the only one bopped in the noggin when noggin-boppin' time rolls around. ↗

— Christopher Moore

#warning #humor

The tyranny of public opinion (and what an opinion!) is as fatuous in the small towns of France as it is in the United States of America. ↗

— Stendhal

#humor #mob-mentality #peer-pressure #humor

I’m fairly certain, Captain,” she said, “that the more you discover about me, the more you will dislike me. Therefore, let’s cut to the chase and acknowledge that we don’t like each other. Then we won’t have to bother with the in-between part.” She was so bloody frank and practical about the whole thing that Christopher couldn’t help but be amused. “I’m afraid I can’t oblige you.” “Why not?” “Because when you said that just now, I found myself starting to like you.” “You’ll recover,” she said. Her decisive tone made him want to smile. “It’s getting worse, actually,” he told her. “Now I’m absolutely convinced that I like you.” Beatrix gave him a patently skeptical stare. “What about my hedgehog? Do you like her, too?” Christopher considered that. “Affection for rodents can’t be rushed.” “Medusa isn’t a rodent. She’s an erinaceid. ↗

— Lisa Kleypas

#hedgehog #humor #romance #humor