#humor

They swoon over Tom, who preens for them, bowing, which sets them to blushing and giggling. God help us all. ↗

— Libba Bray

#beauty

My family's big on denial. And if we denied something long enough, we thought it'd go away. I know that's not how it works, but we're in denial about that, too. ↗

— Lisa Shearin

#family

...it woke me up, got me focused back on my current tasks: find Libby, save Libby, find James, kiss James, maul James, press James for details on Stiles, find Stiles, fight Stiles, find Morgan, find his bride, make them fall in love, make Naomi understand, make Libby normal again, kiss James again, eat a few prices of fruit. Total order. ↗

— Beth Bloom

#humor #run-on-sentence #run-on-sentence-award #funny

I have never committed a sin. I am committed to sin, and my adoration will never waver. ↗

— Bauvard

#funny #humor #sin #funny

I gave three quiet cheers for Minnesota. In Seattle a dusty inch of anything white and chilly means the city lapses into full-on panic mode, as if each falling flake crashes to earth with its own individual baggie of used hypodermic needles. It’s ridiculous. ↗

— Cherie Priest

#snow #winter #humor

It's nice to have a lot of money, but you know, you don't want to keep it around forever. I prefer buying things. Otherwise, it's a little like saving sex for your old age. ↗

— Warren Buffett

#investing #age

So, it's the ever popular Firstborn Child of Doom prophecy,huh, ice-boy? How very cliche. Why can't it ever be the third nephew twice removed who's fated to destroy the worls? Iron Prophecy: The Iron Fey~ Puck ↗

— Julie Kagawa

#humor

My life is part humor, part roses, part thorns. ↗

— Bret Michaels

#life #my life #part #roses #thorns

William slapped him on the shoulder, sending Sex into rapturous convulsions. “Before we do this, I’ve got one question for you. And you can’t lie. This is too important.” A bit sick to his stomach at what such a debaucher could want to know, Paris cast his attention to the black-haired, blue-eyed he-devil. “Ask.” “Are you going to suggest I kiss you for good luck or strength or whatever it is your sex demon needs?” That earned the warrior a two-fingered salute. “So that’s a no?” William asked. Paris worked his jaw. “Here, let me help you off the cliff to the drawbridge.” With no more warning, he shoved William over the ledge. He thought he heard a fading, “ So not cool,” from the bastard as he fell…fell… Splat. ↗

— Gena Showalter

#humor #humor

We're making a list." "And checking it twice." Edward shook his head. ↗

— Laurell K. Hamilton

#humor