#insult

Are you in great physical pain, or is that your thinking expression? ↗

— G.A. Aiken

#put-downs #thinking #insult

A member of Parliament to Disraeli: 'Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease.' That depends, Sir,' said Disraeli, 'whether I embrace your policies or your mistress. ↗

— Benjamin Disraeli

#retort #turnabout #insult

I feel so miserable without you; it’s almost like having you here. ↗

— Stephen Bishop

#insult

Don't die on me," she whispered when the clock struck midnight and he still had not moved. "It's only a little shoulder wound. Goddess, George-don't die on me." His eyes flickered open and he smiled. "I didn't know you cared," he whispered. "And why insult me? I won't die for a wee nick like this; I've had worse in my day." Alanna wiped her wet cheeks. "Of course I care, you unprincipled pickpocket!" she whispered. "Of course I care. ↗

— Tamora Pierce

#insult

Oh.” Timmie gave Bones a shy peek. “Are you Cathy’s brother?” “Whatever would give you the idea that I’m her damn brother?” Bones snapped. ↗

— Jeaniene Frost

#pissed #insult

His hands are off," Gabrielle pointed out. "Posture's wrong," Kat said. "He's still ... hot," Gabrielle said, as if it were the greatest insult in the world. "I feel so objectified. So ... cheap," Hale told them. ↗

— Ally Carter

#insult

He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up. ↗

— Paul Keating

#insult

Lepida, has anyone ever told you that you're a cruel spiteful selfish slut?...You're vicious. You're unprincipled. You mistreat your slaves and abuse your daughter. And furthermore you're the worst, most neglectful, most criminal wife in Rome. I think we can go now. ↗

— Kate Quinn

#comeback #funny #insult #kate-quinn #mistress-of-rome

An old battleax of a woman said to Winston Churchill, "If you were my husband I would put poison in your tea." Churchill's response, "Ma'am if you were my wife I would drink it. ↗

— Winston Churchill

#humor #humour #retort #humor

How can I deal with annoying persons in a way that utterly crushes them witohut tarnishing my carefully developed reputation or extending my already lengthy prison sentence? ↗

— Lady Arabella Snark

#insults #snark #humor