#insults

Thou art a boil, a plague sore, an embossed carbuncle in my corrupted blood. ↗

— William Shakespeare

#art

These words of yours, devoid of Christ, devoid of Spirit, are colder than ice itself, so that they tarnish the beauty of your eloquence. Perhaps they were dragged out of you, poor fellow, by fear of the pontiffs and tyrants, lest you should seem altogether an atheist! ↗

— Martin Luther

#beauty

He crouched at the care window and looked in. "What a lovely family you have. What a charming family. They're all lovely. Except for that one." His finger jabbed the glass. "That one's a bit ugly." The American stepped towards him. "What? What did you say?" "Oh, don't worry. I'm sure his personality makes up for his face. ↗

— Derek Landy

#humor #humorous #insults #random #what-the-hell

Done to death by slanderous tongue ↗

— William Shakespeare

#eulogy #insults-and-slander #death

Her majesty is one verb short of a sentence. ↗

— Jasper Fforde

#insults #put-downs #humor

Save your skin from the corrosive acids from the mouths of toxic people. Someone who just helped you to speak evil about another person can later help another person to speak evil about you. ↗

— Israelmore Ayivor

#bad #corrosive #destroyers #destruction #detractors

You,” Madeline said, her voice hollow and wheezing, “are a bad case of herpes, wizard. You’re inconvenient, embarrassing, no real threat, and you simply will not go away. ↗

— Jim Butcher

#funny

If her rump were any stiffer, she'd break it every time she rides', I thought to Pounce. 'If she fell on the steps, they would never be able to put her together again', he replied. ↗

— Tamora Pierce

#humor #insults #tamora-pierce #humor

Let’s not mince words: the inside of the Sydney casino looks as if Vegas had an illegitimate child with Liberace’s underpants, and that child fell down a staircase and hit its head on the edge of a spade. ↗

— Steve Toltz

#insults #ugly #humor

Sidekick? Fuck you, porky. ↗

— Julie James

#insults #name-calling #humor