#m

Mario, what do you get when you cross an insomniac, an unwilling agnostic and a dyslexic?" "I give." "You get someone who stays up all night torturing himself mentally over the question of whether or not there's a dog. ↗

— David Foster Wallace

#dogs #dyslexia #god #humor #insomnia

Grown ups are complicated creatures, full of quirks and secrets. ↗

— Roald Dahl

#children #humor #humor

Don't go looking for boys in the dark They will say pretty things then leave you with scars. Do go looking for boys in the park For that is where the true gentlemen are. ↗

— Anna Godbersen

#gentlemen #humor #love #wisdom #humor

TV and the Internet are good because they keep stupid people from spending too much time out in public. ↗

— Douglas Coupland

#humor

I once loved a girl who almost loved me, but not as much as she loved John Cusack. ↗

— Chuck Klosterman

#love #relationships #humor

It doesn't matter if they hate you, or embarrass you, or simply don't appreciate your genius for inventing the internet-" "You invented the internet?" It was my idea, Martha said. Rats are delicious, George said. "It was my idea!" Hermes said. "I mean the internet, not the rats. But that's not the point. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#hermes #humor #internet #martha #percy-jackson

There aren't any syringes." Red Sox came over and held a sterile pack out. When she tried to take it form him, he kept a grip on the thing. "I know you'll use this wisely." "Wisely?" She snapped the syringe out of his hand. "No, I'm going to poke him in the eye with it. Because that's what they trained me to do in medical school. ↗

— J.R. Ward

#humor #medical #paranormal #romance #vampires

You're not a woman," he said finally. "You're the Grim Reaper with red hair! ↗

— Jeaniene Frost

#cat #humor #red-hair #redheads #humor

I love being a writer. What I can't stand is the paperwork. ↗

— Peter De Vries

#writing #humor

The Cosmos extends, for all practical purposes, forever. After a brief sedentary hiatus, we are resuming our ancient nomadic way of life. Our remote descendants, safely arrayed on many worlds throughout the Solar System and beyond, will be unified by their common heritage, by their regard for their home planet, and by the knowledge that, whatever other life may be, the only humans in all the Universe come from Earth. They will gaze up and strain to find the blue dot in their skies. They will love it no less for its obscurity and fragility. They will marvel at how vulnerable the repository of all our potential once was, how perilous our infancy, how humble our beginnings, how many rivers we had to cross before we found our way. ↗

— Carl Sagan

#exploration #science #solar-system #life