#mo

Creativity is knowing how to hide your sources ↗

— Albert Einstein

#humor #misattributed #humor

Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day, but set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his life. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#proverb #humor

Every now and then I like to do as I'm told, just to confuse people. ↗

— Tamora Pierce

#obedience #humor

But who prays for Satan? Who, in eighteen centuries, has had the common humanity to pray for the one sinner that needed it most? ↗

— Mark Twain

#common #eighteen #had #humanity #most

You haven't got a letter on yours," George observed. "I suppose she thinks you don't forget your name. But we're not stupid-we know we're called Gred and Forge. ↗

— J.K. Rowling

#humor

Begin at the beginning," the King said, very gravely, "and go on till you come to the end: then stop. ↗

— Lewis Carroll

#humor

Mom. I have something to tell you. I’m undead. Now, I know you may have some preconceived notions about the undead. I know you may not be comfortable with the idea of me being undead. But I’m here to tell you that undead are just like you and me … well, okay. Possibly more like me than you. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#humor #mortal-instruments #simon #vampire #humor

Basically, I have two speeds.... Hostile or smart-aleck. Your choice. ↗

— James Patterson

#humor

Yes, frosting. The final defense of the dying. ↗

— Suzanne Collins

#humor

...hanging out does not make one an artist. A secondhand wardrobe does not make one an artist. Neither do a hair-trigger temper, melancholic nature, propensity for tears, hating your parents, nor even HIV - I hate to say it - none of these make one an artist. They can help, but just as being gay does not make one witty (you can suck a mile of cock, as my friend Sarah Thyre puts it, it still won't make you Oscar Wilde, believe me), the only thing that makes one an artist is making art. And that requires the precise opposite of hanging out; a deeply lonely and unglamorous task of tolerating oneself long enough to push something out. ↗

— David Rakoff

#artists #humor #rent #wilde #writers