#or

Blood is really warm, it's like drinking hot chocolate but with more screaming. ↗

— Ryan Mecum

#haiku #horror #humor #zombies #humor

Sometimes I hear the world discussed as the realm of men. This is not my experience. I have watched men fall to the ground like leaves. They were swept up as memories, and burned. History owns them. These men were petrified in both senses of the word: paralyzed and turned to stone. Their refusal to express feeling killed them. Anachronistic men. Those poor, poor boys. ↗

— Antonella Gambotto-Burke

#boys #death #emotion #gender #history

There are things known—things experienced, felt, and understood—that words hold no power to convey. Attempting to do so only dilutes their substance and does them injustice. ↗

— Richelle E. Goodrich

#richelle #richelle-goodrich #truths #understanding #words

A brick could be used to determine whether you are really in love or not. But you’re never going to be able to tell for sure if you try to run the experiment with the brick upside down. Keep flipping the brick over until the desired outcome is reached, and then you’ll know for certain the test is valid.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

In high school I got voted most likely to get voted for something. Even though I was the only one who voted, it still felt terrific being nominated. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#high-school #humor #funny

And pictures of perfection, as you know, make me sick and wicked. ↗

— Jane Austen

#commentary #humor #snark #humor

Claire was struggling through last summer’s diary volume when Myrnin popped in through the portal, wearing a big floppy black hat and a kind of crazy/stylish pimp coat that covered him from neck to ankles, black leather gloves, and a black and silver walking stick with a dragon’s head on it. And, on his lapel was a button that said, If you can read this, thank a teacher. ↗

— Rachel Caine

#myrnin #humor

Closed. Plenty of time to see it later, remember?" He leads me into the courtyard, and I take the opportunity to admire his backside. Callipygian. There is something better than Notre-Dame. ↗

— Stephanie Perkins

#romance #humor

Maybe I should, I don't know leave? Because this is starting to sound like one of those reality shows I don't want to be in. Maybe you guys want to take turns in the confessional booth. ↗

— Rachel Caine

#tv #humor

He grimaced at that, for he liked to believe he was master of his own fate. 'You think we should all rush madly down the paths of destiny?' 'I think, Lord, that when fate grips you, you do well to put reason aside. ↗

— Bernard Cornwell

#experience #fate #friendship #intuition #life