#quotations

Have you hugged your favorite Dork lately? Most of us are squeezably soft and adorable. ↗

— Michael P. Clutton

#humorous-quotations #humor

Misquotations are the only quotations that are never misquoted. ↗

— Hesketh Pearson

#never #only #quotations

If you fall in love with a character, then you are actually falling in love with the author that wrote the character. Therefore, you could conclude that if you are said author, you are in love with yourself. ↗

— Heather Dowell

#humorous-quotations #in-love #love

Pop music is like an auditory cup of coffee. It has no nutritional value but it gets you going. ↗

— Jim Moorman

#humorous-quotations #humorous-quotes #music

One has to secrete a jelly in which to slip quotations down people's throats - and one always secretes too much jelly. ↗

— Virginia Woolf

#down #jelly #much #people #quotations

I will tell you something that you don’t want to hear: Autumn is ugly! Look at the dying leaves! There is no beauty in dying! Death is always ugly! The beauty of autumn is just an illusion, my friend! Wake up and see the real truth! See the crying leaves! ↗

— Mehmet Murat ildan

#beauty

I get no sense from his note at all,” said Will, bounding to his feet, “except that he can quote Tennyson’s lesser poetry. Sophie, how quickly can you have Tessa ready?” “Half an hour,” said Sophie, not looking up from the dress. “Meet me in the courtyard in half an hour, then,” said Will. “I’ll wake Cyril. And be prepared to swoon at my finery. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#humor #humorous-quotations #will-herondale #humor

'Mr. and Mrs. Lowell are not receiving.' What the hell did that mean? 'I'm not throwing a forty-yard pass. I just have a few questions. I think their daughter is in danger.' ↗

— Darynda Jones

#humor

Smoking will probably kill me, but so will natural selection. ↗

— Carroll Bryant

#humorous-philosophy #humorous-quotations #humor

Oh, adorable, delicious Amelie. If I weren't so completely straight and enamored with cock, I would devour this sweet little tart. ↗

— Ella Dominguez

#humorous-quotations #humor