#relationships

She texted me telling me her mom was dying, so I did the right thing and texted her back a picture of my erect penis and said, “Let’s start a new family.”
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#dying #family #funny #humor #inappropriate

Build me up and I with you. For we are more one than two. ↗

— Deborah Day

#encouragement #friendship #relationships #friendship

Startled, she said, “Oh, I thought you were somebody else.” “No,” I said, “I’m not somebody else—but my clone is.”
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#fright #funny #humor #people #relationships

When a woman once asked Joe how he could come from such a magnificent home and such a good family and still become a gangster, Joe's answer was two-pronged: (a) he wasn't a gangster, he was an outlaw; (b) he came from a magnificent house not a magnificent home. ↗

— Dennis Lehane

#gangsters #family

If your blade were as sharp as your tongue, you'd have sliced me through years ago. ↗

— Erica Goros

#hate #love #relationships #the-daisy-chain #love

It won't be whiskey, won't be meth It'll be your name on my last breath If divorce or death ever do us part The coroner will call it a broken heart ↗

— The Band Perry

#music-lyrics #relationships #death

Jack hadn’t thought of love as a promise before—a promise that, even when the world was falling down around him, would stay kept. But without Sutton saying a word, he knew that there would be comfort when he couldn’t sleep tonight. And tomorrow and the day after, there would be a home to go to, even if it was no more than a pair of arms around him and a head tucked close to his in the darkness. ↗

— Tamara Allen

#love #lover #lovers #relationships #love

Even now, he is every blue blazer getting into cab, every runner along the river,every motorcycle coming and going. ↗

— Melissa Bank

#relationships #love

I milked, of course, and did some work around the barn, and tried not to think about Brian, which was like trying not to breathe. ↗

— Catherine Gilbert Murdock

#relationships #love

We fitted together like the two halves of an oyster-shell. I was Narcissus, embracing the pond in which I was about to drown. However much we had to hide our love, however guarded we had to be about our pleasure, I could not long be miserable about a thing so very sweet. Nor, in my gladness, could I quite believe that anybody would be anything but happy for me if only they knew. ↗

— Sarah Waters

#happiness #lesbian-partners #lgbt #love #passion