#sarcastic

You think he left a big flashing arrow pointing to a filing cabinet labeled 'Evidence Here!'? He's a Stray, Ethan, not Wile E. Coyote! ↗

— Rachel Vincent

#faythe-sanders #funny #prey #sarcastic #funny

(The Mona Lisa), that really is the ugliest portrait I’ve seen, the only thing that supposedly makes it famous is the mystery behind it,” Katherine admitted as she remembered her trips to the Louvre and how she shook her head at the poor tourists crowding around to see a jaundiced, eyebrow-less lady that reminded her of tight-lipped Washington on the dollar bill. Surely, they could have chosen a better portrait of the First President for their currency? ↗

— E.A. Bucchianeri

#artwork #da-vinci #funny #george-washington #humor

Sometimes I say things that I think are obviously sarcastic and people take them quite literally. ↗

— Megan Fox

#i think #literally #obviously #people #quite

Phrase the question any way you like…The answer will still be ‘Kiss my ass. ↗

— M.A. George

#kiss-my-ass #paranormal-romance #sarcastic-humor #humor

Are you fighting evil tonight?...Then you are doing the Lord's work. Shut the fuck up. ↗

— James R. Tuck

#humor

Though he’d never know for sure what had happened to them, his mind was super talented at imagining the absolute worst. ↗

— James Dashner

#humor

...,I have never visited any city in the world where I was not told that I just missed the golden age. I seem never to be on time." Cyrus Sitema ↗

— Gore Vidal

#age

If money’s the god people worship, I’d rather go worship the devil instead. ↗

— Jess C. Scott

#commercialism #core #core-of-the-soul #core-values #devil

Wait-you mean the Mall, as in a bunch of museums in DC that we would wander around and I'd pretend like I understood modern art while really thinking, holy crap, a gremlin could have painted that and for all we know did, or the mall, as in picking out a new pair of shoes, eating food that's terrible for us, and making up life stories for all the people that pass us?" 'I can see now that I must have meant the second.' "What a smart boy. ↗

— Kiersten White

#lend #mall #sarcastic #art

Why did you ask me to live with you? Werewolves hate vampires.” “I don’t,” said Kyle.” I’m not too fond of their kind, though.” He jabbed a finger at Jace. “They think they’re better than everyone else.” “No,” said Jace. “I think I’m better than everyone else. An opinion that has been backed up with ample evidence.” Kyle looked at Simon. “Does he always talk like this?” “Yes. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#jace-wayland #sarcastic #opinions