#satire

The universe seems to be a lot like a car or a computer, in that it's designed to be user-friendly, which doesn't necessarily require the user to have a clue what's going on under the hood. ↗

— Michel Templet

#satire #science #design

I have been assured by a very knowing American of my acquaintance in London, that a young healthy child well nursed is at a year old a most delicious, nourishing, and wholesome food, whether stewed, roasted, baked, or boiled; and I make no doubt that it will equally serve in a fricassee or a ragout. ↗

— Jonathan Swift

#humor #satire #equality

The Open Road goes to the used-car lot. ↗

— Louis Simpson

#capitalism #freedom #frontier #individualism #liberalism

Since my trips to Earth, I've only managed to assemble a few basics facts about humans, condensing them in to four, overall points: kids got Reese's, teens got recess, adults got recessions, and seniors got receding. ↗

— Tai Odunsi

#greek-mythology #humor #mount-olympus #satire #valentines-day

Satire is enjoyable compensation for being forced to think. ↗

— Edgar Johnson

#satire #thinking #humor

She wore an A-line bridal gown with a V-shaped neckline while Apollo playing Bach's Air on the G string. ↗

— Tai Odunsi

#greek #greek-mythology #humor #olympians #percy-jackson-and-the-olympians

I tossed my shoulders and swaggered away, whistling with pleasure. In the gutter I saw a long cigaret butt. I picked it up without shame, lit it as I stood with one foot in the gutter, puffed it and exhaled toward the stars. I was an American, and goddamn proud of it. ↗

— John Fante

#fante #humor #inspirational #satire #humor

Man is the only animal that loves his neighbor as himself and cuts his throat if his theology isn't straight ↗

— Mark Twain

#religion #satire #love

He has a very nice face and style, really," said Mrs. Kenwigs. "He certainly has," added Miss Petowker. "There's something in his appearance quite--dear, dear, what's the word again?" "What word?" inquired Mr. Lillyvick. "Why--dear me, how stupid I am!" replied Miss Petowker, hesitating. "What do you call it when lords break off doorknockers, and beat policemen, and play at coaches with other people's money, and all that sort of thing?" "Aristocratic?" suggested the collector. "Ah! Aristocratic," replied Miss Petowker; "something very aristocratic about him, isn't there?" The gentlemen held their peace, and smiled at each other, as who should say, "Well! there's no accounting for tastes;" but the ladies resolved unanimously that Nicholas had an aristocratic air, and nobody caring to dispute the position, it was established triumphantly. ↗

— Charles Dickens

#satire #money

What you have not published, you can destroy. The word once sent forth can never be recalled. ↗

— Horace

#satire