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#sex

Read through the most famous quotes by topic #sex




Chastity always takes its toll. In some it produces pimples; in others, sex laws.


Karl Kraus


#humor #sex #humor

The man kisses me and I just hop right on him like he's the hottest new ride at Disneyland.


Karen Marie Moning


#humor #love #sex #humor

I suppose you had to," Wes said when Phin went back to join him at the table. "Pretty much. She seduced me." "Yeah, right," Wes said. "She said, 'Please fix the kitchen drain,' and you interpreted that--" "She said, 'Fuck me.' " Phin put two balls on the table and picked up his cue. "I interpreted that to mean she wanted sex." "Oh." Wes picked up his cue. "That would have been my call, too." He squinted at the table. "Why would she have said that?" "On a guess? Because she wanted sex.


Jennifer Crusie


#sex #humor

It wasn’t the first time I’d run across sex spells: they were just as common as electricity-kindled spells. They just aren’t convenient for your average on-the-go magical needs. “Do all the memory spells require that?” I asked. “I don’t think so. I just noticed it on the last couple of retrieval ones.” “Uh, maybe I could just get myself, you know, privately …?” I suggested. I regretted it immediately, and felt my face flush with warmth. What the hell was I going to do? Ask Lon if he had any porn I could borrow and hole up in his library’s washroom?


Jenn Bennett


#sex #humor

North is a powerful man, and you're still connected to him." Flo frowned. "Probably sexual memory, those Capricorns are insatiable. Well, you know. Sea Goat. And of course, you're a Fish. You'll end up back in bed with him." Andie slammed the car door. "You know what I'd like for Christmas, Flo? Boundaries. You can gift me early if you'd like.


Jennifer Crusie


#mothers-and-daughters #relationships #sex #humor

Since i couldn't remember the "real" first time i'd lost my virginity, this would have become my de facto first time. I wanted a better story then: I did it with this boy who i wasn't very into and who had mysterious Gaterade breath; in his room decorated with sports equipment; at least he was nice enough to provide condoms and get his ancient, horny dog to leave us along.


Gabrielle Zevin


#gabrielle-zevin #humor #naomi #sex #humor

If Nostradamus and Tiresias used gay magic to have a baby, and that baby grew up to make a lot of predictions about the destiny of clones – if that happened, then I would have a reason to convert to asexuality. As it is, I just kind of felt like not doing it.


Benson Bruno


#clones #funny #humor #prophecy #funny

I’ll leave before anyone wakes up. Promise.” “They’ll hear us,” I said, my heart pounding in growing panic. “I’ll take off my boots.” “How will that help you keep your mouth shut while we have sex?


Missy Welsh


#humor

Patch: Y ademas hueles bien Nora: Se llama duchars. Utilizas jabón, champú y agua caliente. Patch:b Y te desnudas, conozco el ejercicio.


Becca Fitzpatrick


#love #sexy-humor #humor

She imagined herself both queen and slave, dominatrix and victim. In her imagination she was making love with men of all skin colors--white, black, yellow--with homosexuals and beggars. She was anyone's, and anyone could do anything to her. She had one, two, three orgasms, one after another. She imagined everything she had never imagined before, and she gave herself to all that was most base and most pure.


Paulo Coelho


#masturbation #sexuality #imagination






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