#steal

The thief, as will become apparent, was a special type of thief. This thief was an artist of theft. Other thieves merely stole everything that was not nailed down, but this thief stole the nails as well. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#stealing #thievery #thieves #humor

I cried because I had no wallet, until I met a man who had no money. I don’t know why he had no money, because that man stole my wallet.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#crying #humor #money #steal #stolen

I've got kids that enjoy stealing. I've got kids that don't think about stealing one way or the other, and I've got kids that just tolerate stealing because they know they've got nothing else to do. But nobody--and I mean nobody--has ever been hungry for it like this boy. If he had a bloody gash across his throat and a physiker was trying to sew it up, Lamora would steal the needle and thread and die laughing. He...steals too much. ↗

— Scott Lynch

#locke-lamora #stealing #thieves #tolerance

Even though I know my own name (barely), I still sometimes write my name wrong. Usually it only happens when I write in cursive and am endorsing checks for money I can’t recall earning. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #humor #stealing #funny

It’s hard to steal somebody’s shoes while they are wearing them and not have them notice. But that’s what politicians have done in this country. Not only that, but they replaced all our footwear with concrete boots.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#country #freedom #liberty #politicians #politics

Stealing, of course, is a crime, and a very impolite thing to do. But like most impolite things, it is excusable under certain circumstances. Stealing is not excusable if, for instance, you are in a museum and you decide that a certain painting would look better in your house, and you simply grab the painting and take it there. But if you were very, very hungry, and you had no way of obtaining money, it would be excusable to grab the painting, take it to your house, and eat it. ↗

— Lemony Snicket

#money

I am accusing him of stealing my best material, he was a very funny man. ↗

— Frank Carson

#am #best #funny #him #i

My buddies wanted to be firemen, farmers or policemen, something like that. Not me, I just wanted to steal people's money! ↗

— John Dillinger

#farmers #firemen #i #just #like

Worry - a God, invisible but omnipotent. It steals the bloom from the cheek and lightness from the pulse; it takes away the appetite, and turns the hair gray. ↗

— Benjamin Disraeli

#away #bloom #cheek #god #gray

Do you not know that God entrusted you with that money (all above what buys necessities for your families) to feed the hungry, to clothe the naked, to help the stranger, the widow, the fatherless; and, indeed, as far as it will go, to relieve the wants of all mankind? How can you, how dare you, defraud the Lord, by applying it to any other purpose? ↗

— John Wesley

#christianity #clothing #compassion #evangelism #faithfulness