#surreal

Writers fish for the right words like fishermen fish for, um, whatever those aquatic creatures with fins and gills are called. 
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— Jarod Kintz

#aquatic #bizarre #creatures #fins #fish

There’s nothing I like better than a beautiful sunset. Except maybe a gorgeous sunrise. And a naked woman painted pink and orange floating through the sky. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#humor #sunset #surreal #beauty

To be a surrealist means barring from your mind all remembrance of what you have seen, and being always on the lookout for what has never been. ↗

— Rene Magritte

#barring #been #being #lookout #means

You achieve the surreal jokes through the realism by making it elastic. ↗

— Dylan Moran

#elastic #jokes #making #realism #surreal

We are both drawn to surreal situations so the writing was a joy. ↗

— Dylan Moran

#drawn #joy #real situations #situations #surreal

Sitting on the floor, I'd replay the past in my head. Funny, that's all I did, day after day after day for half a year, and I never tired of it. What I'd been through seemed so vast, with so many facets. Vast, but real, very real, which was why the experience persisted in towering before me, like a monument lit up at night. And the thing was, it was a monument to me. ↗

— Haruki Murakami

#memories #past #real #remembering #surreal

A brick could be surgically inserted in the chest of a man who needs a heart transplant. And for just $20,000 more dollars, that brick could be replaced with a new heart.
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket #funny #humor #random #strange

A blanket can be wrapped around one’s head and used as a helmet. It’s particularly appropriate if you wear your blanket helmet during a pillow fight with me, because unbeknownst to you, I’ll have a brick stuffed at the bottom of my pillowcase.
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket #funny #humor #random #strange

A tailor walks into a lawyer, and the bar says, "I like your suit." And the tailor replies, "This morning I spotted a non-sequitur detective. Don't worry, he didn't follow me. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #surreal #funny

A blanket could be drenched in water, frozen, and then enjoyed like a giant cotton popsicle by prisoners of a gulag, who might consider this a tasty treat compared to what they normally eat. 
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket #funny #humor #random #strange