#u

Stacey muttered, "But I hate this school, and this city, and the sooner I leave, the better. I want to start over in a new place. I haven't . . ." her voice trailed off and she looked away from Jason, hoping instead to find her words among the falling raindrops. "Do you ever feel like you aren't the person you're supposed to be? That you could be a different person - and have a better life - if things had been just a little different? ↗

— J.M. Reep

#teenager #young-adult #life

If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button. ↗

— Sam Levenson

#die #elevator #push #sure #up

It's only worth staying in bed if you're young and in good company. ↗

— Carlos Ruiz Zafón

#humor

If you ever find yourself in the wrong story, leave. ↗

— Mo Willems

#humor #humorous #philosophy #psychology #humor

Women are angels, and when someone breaks your wings...We simply continue to fly...On a broomstick. We are flexible like that ↗

— Grace

#humor

Then set the hounds loose, boy - it's time to kick demonic ass! ↗

— Darren Shan

#humor #humor

A few years ago, when I was hitchhiking through Laramie, Wyoming, I met an old and infertile man named John. I told him, “I think I’d have made a good son, John. But I’d have made an even better Johnson.” He nodded as he took a long drag from his cigarette before he said, “I think I would have made a good Robert Derrick. But I'd have made an even better Derrick Robert.” I was silent for a few minutes, because I knew all too well what he meant. I’ve often felt I’d have made a great Bruce Robert, and an even better Robert the Bruce than Robert the Bruce ever was. Because, as many people have told me, “You can take all the Bruces in the world, including Mr. Willis, and you’d be the only one who could simply be called ‘The Bruce.’” But you couldn’t call me “The Boss,” because that title belongs to another Bruce. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #hitchhiking #humor #humour #infertile

He soon acquired the forlorn look that one sees in vegetarians. ↗

— Gabriel Garcí­a Márquez

#vegetarianism #humor

Blake took a small roll from the tray on the table, then put it back in favor of a larger one. And maybe a little butter. It certainly couldn't hurt. And jam...no, he drew the line at jam. She was a spy, after all. ↗

— Julia Quinn

#julia-quinn #romance #humor

I'm an American, our names don't mean shit. ↗

— Quentin Tarantino

#humorous-quotations #humor