#w

If you hold a cat by the tail you learn things you cannot learn any other way. ↗

— Mark Twain

#cannot #cat #hold #learn #other

Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing. ↗

— Dave Barry

#anybody #clothing #golf #hideous #open

People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them. ↗

— Dave Barry

#never #people #religious #religious views #share

If God had wanted us to be concerned for the plight of the toads, he would have made them cute and furry. ↗

— Dave Barry

#cute #furry #god #had #made

Your modern teenager is not about to listen to advice from an old person, defined as a person who remembers when there was no Velcro. ↗

— Dave Barry

#about #advice #defined #listen #modern

My problem with chess was that all my pieces wanted to end the game as soon as possible. ↗

— Dave Barry

#end #game #pieces #possible #problem

And so by the fifteenth century, on October 8, the Europeans were looking for a new place to try to get to, and they came up with a new concept: the West. ↗

— Dave Barry

#century #concept #europeans #fifteenth #fifteenth century

For me, the worst part of playing golf, by far, has always been hitting the ball. ↗

— Dave Barry

#ball #been #far #golf #hitting

If you have a big enough dictionary, just about everything is a word. ↗

— Dave Barry

#big #big enough #dictionary #enough #everything

It was Public Art, defined as art that is purchased by experts who are not spending their own personal money. ↗

— Dave Barry

#defined #experts #money #own #personal