What’s the difference between an omelet and an Omelet? One has cheese and vegetables, while the other just has Vegetables. I’m talking, of course, about my good friend Omelet Vegetables. He got his name because his mother was some sort of vegan hippy. But now that she doesn’t even eat eggs, and she really regrets naming him that. I met him while attending the University of Phoenix--the very same University of Phoenix campus that burned to the ground, and then rose up out of its own ashes. Fortunately, we didn’t have class that night. Omelet hates it when people greet him with, “What’s cooking?” And I completely understand.

— Jarod Kintz

#ashes #burned #funny #humor #phoenix