#absurd

It is certain that the study of human psychology, if it were undertaken exclusively in prisons, would also lead to misrepresentation and absurd generalizations. ↗

— Jacques Yves Cousteau

#also #certain #exclusively #generalizations #human

I love like an albino. But I don’t want to get sunburned, so would you please pass the ketchup? ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#albino #funny #humor #love #surrealism

I love the sunrise, but not as much as I love you. Will you pass me my midnight-black blindfold? ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #humor #love #sunrise #age

I am a personal optimist but a skeptic about all else. What may sound to some like anger is really nothing more than sympathetic contempt. I view my species with a combination of wonder and pity, and I root for its destruction. And please don't confuse my point of view with cynicism; the real cynics are the ones who tell you everything's gonna be all right. ↗

— George Carlin

#anger

Absurdity is the ecstasy of intellectualism. ↗

— Criss Jami

#absurdity #art #artist #ecstasy #experiment

I've decided to donate my arsenal of machine guns to a hunting charity. That should help raze a million bucks. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#guns #hunting #change

Looking at the room, I can tell that you are the most beautiful girl in the room. (In the whole wide room) And when you're on the street (Depending on the street) I bet you are definitely in the top three ↗

— Flight of the Conchords

#beauty

I saw something scary. It was a boy, asking me what I’m doing naked in his father’s fridge. Dinner party’s over. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#dinner-party #dream #naked #scary #surreal

Katie cleared her throat again. Then she looked into the window at her gums. She said, "To change the subject, do you think I could tell if I had gingivitis? ↗

— M.T. Anderson

#gingivitis #humor #change

Dating should really be more like furniture store commercials....I would love to' pay no interest for 6 months ↗

— Josh Stern

#commercials-furniture #dating #store-humor #dating