#er

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. ↗

— Erma Bombeck

#battery #car #go #guarantees #live

You can tell more about a person by what he says about others than you can by what others say about him. ↗

— Audrey Hepburn

#him #more #others #person #say

Never accept a drink from a urologist. ↗

— Erma Bombeck

#drink #never #urologist

God created man, but I could do better. ↗

— Erma Bombeck

#could #created #god #i #man

What's with you men? Would hair stop growing on your chest if you asked directions somewhere? ↗

— Erma Bombeck

#chest #directions #growing #hair #men

Everybody thinks that equality comes from identifying people, and that's not where equality comes from. ↗

— Matt Bomer

#equality #everybody #identifying #people #thinks

I think when you play a role, you always have to be a defense attorney for that character. ↗

— Matt Bomer

#attorney #character #defense #i #i think

That's Collin."She panicked."He can't see you!" Don't tell me you're afraid of your own brother?"Staton seemed to think that was funny.She hated the smirk that crept over his face. She shoved him."You want Collin to kill you?Hide." That made him laugh louder."Kill me?" Stop it,"she warned him,or he'll hear you." You think I should be afraid of your brother?I'm immortal." Collin's heavy steps filled the downstairs hallway.Her heart raced.Why was life so complicated? ↗

— Lynne Ewing

#stanton #funny

We were five heterosexual, good-looking men. We competed against each other for the sexiest girls... I won. ↗

— Simon Le Bon

#competed #each #five #good-looking #heterosexual

As it has been told to me, my Dad had some kind of deal with Dick Clark. But when we got here, that fell through. So we were out here with no job, no furniture, no food. ↗

— Danny Bonaduce

#clark #dad #deal #fell #food