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#funny

Read through the most famous quotes by topic #funny




If the events of September 11, 2001, have proven anything, it's that the terrorists can attack us, but they can't take away what makes us American -- our freedom, our liberty, our civil rights. No, only Attorney General John Ashcroft can do that. ↗


— Jon Stewart


#civil-rights #funny #patriot-act #freedom

There was a small wooden gazebo built out over the water; Isabelle was sitting in it, staring out across the lake. She looked like a princess in a fairy tale, waiting at the top of her tower for someone to ride up and rescue her. Not that traditional princess behavior was like Isabelle at all. Isabelle with her whip and boots and knives would chop anyone who tried to pen her up in a tower into pieces, build a bridge out of the remains, and walk carelessly to freedom, her hair looking fabulous the entire time. ↗


— Cassandra Clare


#funny #freedom

About adultery: Don’t go looking for pancakes when you have flapjacks at home. ↗


— Jarod Kintz


#funny #funny

His name was Tom Tombstone, and if he had a middle name it was probably Death. But I didn’t call him Tom, or even Mr. Tombstone, because he introduced himself as Robert Winston. And I wondered how this stranger could shake my hand, look me in the eye, smile, and expect me to believe such a bold-faced lie? ↗


— Jarod Kintz


#death #funny #hilarious #humor #introduction

Time is such a waste of time to think about, because the longer you ponder it, the more of it you lose. And before you know it, you don’t know it, because you are nothing but dusty worm food. ↗


— Jarod Kintz


#funny #humor #knowledge #loss #ponder

Want a little cheese with that whine, maestro? ↗


— Madeleine Urban


#funny

I'm the kind of guy who puts other people first. Particularly if there’s danger up ahead. Now I’m not saying I’m any more cowardly than the next man, unless that next man is any other man besides my clone. ↗


— Jarod Kintz


#cowardly #danger #funny #funny

There should be more sincerity and heart in human relations, more silence and simplicity in our interactions. Be rude when you’re angry, laugh when something is funny, and answer when you’re asked. ↗


— Anton Chekhov


#funny

It's funny, don't you think, how time seems to do a lot of things? It flies, it tells, and worst of all, it runs out. ↗


— Markus Zusak


#funny

Your welcome means more to me, Ivy Alisha Tamwood, than a thousand souls. Watching Rachel work is a wonder of one catastrophe after another. ↗


— Kim Harrison


#funny






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