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#funny

Read through the most famous quotes by topic #funny




Well, I don’t know how to break this to you, but I think they might have noticed we broke into Gringotts. ↗


— J.K. Rowling


#gringotts #ron-weasley #death

As it happens, I’m a terrible dancer. Bears are simply not made for dancing. We’re much better at sitting and sleeping and singing. But there are humans who catch bears and force us to dance. It’s agony. And there are other humans who pay to watch us.’ Hannah sighed. ‘I suppose you’re right to distrust humans.’ ‘And that is why I must eat you,’ said the bear forlornly. ‘For the benefit of the entire bear population of the world. I’m awfully sorry about this.’ ‘That’s all right.’ Hannah shrugged her shoulders. ‘Is there any point in my trying to run away?’ ‘None. We bears may not be able to dance but we are experts when it comes to chasing things.’ ‘What if I climb a tree?’ ‘I’ll climb up after you, or push the tree over. It all depends on what sort of tree you choose to climb. Either way, you’ll end up eaten.’ ‘So be it,’ said Hannah. ‘How should I prepare myself?’ ‘I beg your pardon?’ ‘Will you eat me with my clothes on?’ ‘Of course. Otherwise it would be bad manners. ↗


— Doug MacLeod


#inspirational #random #funny

Senses of humor define people, as factions, deeper rooted than religious or political opinions. When carrying out everyday tasks, opinions are rather easy to set aside, but those whom a person shares a sense of humor with are his closest friends. They are always there to make the biggest influence. ↗


— Criss Jami


#beliefs #best-friends #brain #daily #daily-life

You're not just doing that to impress her, are you?" "Everything I do is to impress her. It's my mission in life," he said with a completely serious face, while he squeezed my knee under the table. Mom burst out laughing. "I like him," she said. "Me too. I think I'll keep him," I said, taking his hand and twisting my fingers with his. "Good," he said, giving my hand a squeeze. ↗


— Chelsea M. Cameron


#funny #hunter-zaccadelli #my-favorite-mistake #sweet #taylor-and-hunter

It's a funny thing about stories. It doesn't feel like you make them up, more like you find them. You type and type and you know you haven't got it yet, because somewhere out there, there's that perfect thing -- the unexpected ending that was always going to happen. That place you've always been heading for, but never expected to go. ↗


— Steven Moffat


#funny

I spend most of my life naked. In fact, I often have to be told by the people around me that it's inappropriate to be as naked as I am. ↗


— Adam Levine


#funny #hot #funny

I held in the sneeze, though, by thinking of the word cucumber. It always works. ↗


— Merrie Haskell


#sneeze #funny

If I were a superhero, I’d be Honesty Man. I’d be so transparent I’d be invisible.
 ↗


— Jarod Kintz


#honesty #humor #invisible #super-hero #transparent

In the past five minutes, I had managed to tease my libido, scald my crotch, and catch a world-class elbow with my forehead. ↗


— B. Justin Shier


#humour #funny

Are you having fun playing with those plastic 3-D models of ears, noses and throats? That’s kind of like what I do, except instead of cute little plastic models, it’s living human tissue, and instead of playing, I’m fucking working, and instead of fun, it’s fucking not fun, it’s serious. ↗


— Colin Nissan


#funny #humor #funny






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