#funny

It's a funny thing, the less people have to live for, the less nerve they have to risk losing nothing. ↗

— Zora Neale Hurston

#funny thing #less #live #losing #nerve

We've seen some insane signs: 'Is that a loaf of bread in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?' Funny stuff along those lines. Very original. One just said, 'I will do unspeakable things.' I thought that was very interesting - and mildly terrifying! ↗

— Josh Hutcherson

#bread #funny #funny stuff #happy #i

So we used to look for funny songs, and learn them and play them. And we used to play them in pubs. ↗

— Neil Innes

#learn #look #play #pubs #songs

If you were half as funny as you think you are, you'd be twice as funny as you are now. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#humorous #jace #funny

Everyone should be able to do one card trick, tell two jokes, and recite three poems, in case they are ever trapped in an elevator. ↗

— Lemony Snicket

#funny

The planet is fine. The people are fucked. ↗

— George Carlin

#humanity #humor #funny

What the hell is that?" I laughed. "It's my fox hat." "Your fox hat?" "Yeah, Pudge. My fox hat." "Why are you wearing your fox hat?" I asked. "Because no one can catch the motherfucking fox. ↗

— John Green

#humor #funny

When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye. ↗

— Cathy Guisewite

#funny #lemons #funny

I came from a real tough neighborhood. Once a guy pulled a knife on me. I knew he wasn't a professional, the knife had butter on it. ↗

— Rodney Dangerfield

#funny #humour #neighborhoods #funny

Don't be so humble - you are not that great. ↗

— Golda Meir

#golda #meir #true #funny