#funny

My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them. ↗

— Mitch Hedberg

#because #did #died #fake #i

A waffle is like a pancake with a syrup trap. ↗

— Mitch Hedberg

#like #pancake #syrup #trap #waffle

I wear a necklace, cause I wanna know when I'm upside down. ↗

— Mitch Hedberg

#cause #down #i #know #necklace

This shirt is dry clean only. Which means... it's dirty. ↗

— Mitch Hedberg

#clean #dirty #dry #means #only

Hitchcock had a charm about him. He was very funny at times. He was incredibly brilliant in his field of suspense. ↗

— Tippi Hedren

#brilliant #charm #field #funny #had

One lion thinks it's just hilarious to tackle us. He's very funny about it... and we always know when it will happen. ↗

— Tippi Hedren

#always #funny #happen #hilarious #just

For years I used to bore my wife over lunch with stories about funny incidents. ↗

— James Herriot

#bore #funny #i #incidents #lunch

It's a funny thing, the less people have to live for, the less nerve they have to risk losing nothing. ↗

— Zora Neale Hurston

#funny thing #less #live #losing #nerve

We've seen some insane signs: 'Is that a loaf of bread in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?' Funny stuff along those lines. Very original. One just said, 'I will do unspeakable things.' I thought that was very interesting - and mildly terrifying! ↗

— Josh Hutcherson

#bread #funny #funny stuff #happy #i

To me, the musical is best when it's a musical comedy. So if you have a very, very funny show, and very good, funny songs, that's what the musical does best. ↗

— Eric Idle

#comedy #does #funny #good #me