#hum

She told me she loved me. She told me a lot of things. Some of those things were true, and some of those may or may not have been true. It’s kind of hard to tell, because to be honest, I wasn’t listening.
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— Dark Jar Tin Zoo

#distracted #distraction #funny #humor #listening

If a child shows himself to be incorrigible, he should be decently and quietly beheaded at the age of twelve, lest he grow to maturity, marry, and perpetuate his kind. ↗

— Don Marquis

#humorous #incorrigible #age

Geoffrey looked startled to see both his great-uncles bearing down upon him with such haste; he hadn’t realized men their age could move so fast. ↗

— Sharon Kay Penman

#age

Look what the cat dragged in," Ms. Skoglund said. "Were you waylaid by all your female admirers?" "It's nothing like that," the boy said. "Besides, you know I only have eyes for you." "Sure you do," Ms. Skoglund said. "I mean, why bother with one of those skinny little things your age when you can go for someone who's trying to lose another thirty pounds before her twenty-year class reunion next summer? That makes sense. ↗

— Jon S. Lewis

#age

Society is so short on honest women who are comfortable with looking older as they remain thirty-nine. But there is no scarcity of women who are shamelessly exceeding thirty-nine as they continue to look nineteen. ↗

— Bauvard

#funny #humor #women #age

The difference between design and research seems to be a question of new versus good. Design doesn't have to be new, but it has to be good. Research doesn't have to be good, but it has to be new. I think these two paths converge at the top: the best design surpasses its predecessors by using new ideas, and the best research solves problems that are not only new, but worth solving. So ultimately design and research are aiming for the same destination, just approaching it from different directions. ↗

— Paul Graham

#age

I make love like farm equipment—not to farm equipment. There is a difference, though my cousin can’t tell it.
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— Dark Jar Tin Zoo

#farm #farm-equipment #funny #humor #love

We made love like two people trying to make love like three people in the trunk of a car.
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— Dark Jar Tin Zoo

#humor #love #sex #age

My love is sticky, like glue. I'd kill a horse just to give you some.
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— Dark Jar Tin Zoo

#glue #horse #humor #love #age

It is well known that stone can think, because the whole of electronics is based on that fact, but in some universes men spend ages looking for other intelligences in the sky without once looking under their feet. That is because they've got the time-span all wrong. From stone's point of view the universe is hardly created and mountain ranges are bouncing up and down like organ-stops while continents zip backward and forward in general high spirits, crashing into each other from the sheer joy of momentum and getting their rocks off. It is going to be quite some time before stone notices its disfiguring skin disease and starts to scratch, which is just as well. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#humor #perspective #time #age