#humor

�Don'�t worry."� Arriane stood next to Luce. �This place is like a reject revolving door. People come and go all the time because of some parole issue crazy parents whatever. Randy'�s off tonight. No one else gives a damn. If anyone gives you a second look� just give �em a third one. Or send them over to me.�" She made a fist. ↗

— Lauren Kate

#humor #swords-cross #humor

Those women like to see their tongues dance. ↗

— Ray Bradbury

#humor

We can arrange class time with, um, minimum interaction." That's perfect. The part where the interacting is all minimum-y," Montgomery said eagerly. That was almost a Buffyism," Mica pointed out to Ellen. Almost," Ellen admitted grudgingly. ↗

— Tracy Lynn

#geek #humor #humor

They were perfectly suited. They would speak of books the livelong day and night and bore everyone else but themselves to distraction. ↗

— Loretta Chase

#humor #humor

The stork is voiceless because there is really nothing to say. ↗

— Will Cuppy

#birds #humor #humorous #humor

Bonkie bit Garp!" Garp bit Bonkie ↗

— John Irving

#humor

When faced with something I fear, I tend to eat spaghetti. ↗

— Mark Helprin

#humor #spaghetti #humor

Teresa stood up, surprising Thomas with her confidence. “Guess he forgot to tell the little part about me kicking him in the groin and climbing out the window.” Thomas almost laughed as Newt turned to an older boy standing nearby, whose face had turned bright red. “Congrats, Jeff,” Newt said. “You’re officially the first guy here to get your butt beat by a girl. ↗

— James Dashner

#maze-runner #teresa #humor

Families is where our nation finds hope, where wings take dream. ↗

— George W. Bush

#dreams

Men are not potatoes! ↗

— Robert A. Heinlein

#science #humor