#humor

Here comes Mamma Vauquerr, fair as a starrr; and strung up like a bunch of carrots. Aren't we suffocating ourselves a wee bit?' he asked, placing a hand on the top of her corset. 'A bit of a crush in the vestibule, here, Mamma! If we start crying, there'll be an explosion. Never mind, I'll be there to collect the bits--just like an antiquary.' 'Now, there's the language of true French gallantry,' murmured Madame Vauquer in an aside to Madame Couture. ↗

— Honoré de Balzac

#comedy #good-natured #humor #mockery #obliviousness

Would you buy potato chips that listed potato by-product or potato digest as an ingredient ↗

— Michelle T. Bernard

#humor #natural #raw-feeding #nature

From the bow of the canoe she asked, "Do you know a rain dance?" "First I need a virgin. ↗

— Carl Hiaasen

#nature

Nature" doesn't really have intentions, per se. Nature is a drunk waking up from a weekend bender, ambling through a messy kitchen in a pair of mismatched slippers, seeing its car in the neighbor's pool and saying, "Ah good. It was dirty. Just the thing. ↗

— Pat Connid

#humor #humorous #humour #nature #nature

Think of the fierce energy concentrated in an acorn! You bury it in the ground, and it explodes into an oak! ↗

— George Bernard Shaw

#humor #nature #oak #nature

It is just as foolish to complain that people are selfish and treacherous as it is to complain that the magnetic field does not increase unless the electric field has a curl. Both are laws of nature. ↗

— John von Neumann

#humor #nature

Whenever man comes up with a better mousetrap, nature immediately comes up with a better mouse. ↗

— James D. Carswell

#humor #nature #science #nature

He was a natural Protestant when I met him.", Em would say. "He protested everything. ↗

— Jerry Pinto

#nature

The swing of his nature took him from extreme languor to devouring energy; and as I knew well, he was never so truly formidable as when, for days on end, he had been lounging in his armchair amid his improvisations and his black-letter editions. Then it was that the lust of the chase would suddenly come upon him, and that his brilliant reasoning power would rise to the level of intuition, until those who were unacquainted with his methods would look askance at him as on a man whose knowledge was not that of other mortals. When I saw him that afternoon so enwrapped in the music of St. James's Hall I felt that an evil time might be coming upon those whom he had set himself to hunt down. ↗

— Arthur Conan Doyle

#sherlock-holmes #music

As the author of Lost Wife, Saw Barracuda - True Stories from a Sharm el Sheikh Scuba Diving Instructor, I know a thing or two about guide books but I have never quite seen anything like the Buns Guide before. There is certainly nothing arse-about-face with this book and indeed you have to admire the author's cheek, although thankfully he didn't include a photo of it here! What shines through in this quality-produced book is "Stryke" Clayton's intelligence, wit and ability to get away with a subject normally found in magazines and websites of questionable pedigree. The result is a hilarious and surprisingly tasteful book written by someone who would probably feel at home in the cast of Monty Python's Flying Circus. The Buns Guide is a great poke in the ribs at those nature guide books and the plastic animal or fish identity picture cards they sell in national parks around the world. With so many parts to the female anatomy I'm sure the author may well be considering a sequel or two? A great read, very funny and a well-produced book. Full marks here! ↗

— John Kean

#international #home