#humor

Louisiana is a fresh-air mental asylum. ↗

— James Lee Burke

#insanity #louisiana #humor

Let's take my truck," Jim said as he hit the gravel. "Less noise." And it has a radio, right?" With tragic concentration Adrian started warming up his voice, sounding like a moose being backstroked by a chesse grater. Jim shook his head at Eddie as the doors opened "How can you stand that racket?" Selective deafness" Teach me,master. ↗

— J.R. Ward

#humor

I finally found something that can stop the fox. The fox cannot summit Strawberry Hill.” - Takumi ↗

— John Green

#looking-for-alaska #strawberry-hill #takumi #humor

my good qualities are under your protection, and you are to exaggerate them as much as possible; and, in return, it belongs to me to find occasion for teasing and quarreling with you as often as may be... ↗

— Jane Austen

#romance #humor

You’re used to being the smartest guy in the room. Solitary confinement will do that. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#humor #funny

Semper ubi sub ubi (Latin for "Always wear underwear") ↗

— Bryanna Lee

#humor

The Gunman is useless. I know it. He knows it. The whole bank knows it. ↗

— Markus Zusak

#humor

Who knows what goes on in the mind of a cat? ↗

— Julie Kagawa

#fairies #humor #humor

Bitch, you are SO lucky you didn’t try to eat my dog. ↗

— Jeaniene Frost

#tyler #humor

It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to paint it. ↗

— Steven Wright

#paint #world #humor