#humor

LADY BRACKNELL Thirty-five is a very attractive age. London society is full of women of the very highest birth who have, of their own free choice, remained thirty-five for years. Lady Dumbleton is an instance in point. To my own knowledge she has been thirty-five ever since she arrived at the age of forty, which was many years ago now. ↗

— Oscar Wilde

#humor #women #age

Love smells like a flower in bloom. A flower that's sitting on a pile of steaming feces. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #humor #love #age

Love doesn’t have form (aside from your naked body), but it does have a shape. The shape of love is circular, like a STOP sign. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#humor #love #age

I was suicidal for two solid centuries once. That was during the early part of what they now call the Dark Ages, in medieval Europe. Suicidal tendencies were de rigueur at the time, and I’m nothing if not trendy. ↗

— Gene Doucette

#age

Coincidentally, a good age for a Japanese girl is younger than twenty five, because that's when she turns into a 'Christmas Cake'. Christmas cakes, as everyone knows, are desirable before the twenty fifth but afterward quickly become stale and are put on the shelf. ↗

— Andrew Davidson

#humor #life #women #age

How did that go?’ he asked. ‘Your first lengthy conversation with a girl your own age?’ ‘Fabulous,’ said Artemis, voice dripping with sarcasm. ‘We’re planning a June wedding. ↗

— Eoin Colfer

#age

They-" He stopped and just blinked at me for a minute. "You know, people are always saying that you're cuckoo. Looney Tunes. Off the freaking edge. But I tell 'em, no, she's okay. She's got some...anger management issues. But you know what? They're right. You're nuts. ↗

— Karen Chance

#truth #anger

I'm sorry, but -I'm sorry!' I yelped and skipped backward as Gorg advanced on me. 'You were given bad information. Probably some human's fault.' I AM PRINCIPAL ANGER COORDINATOR ASSOCIATE-OF-THE-MONTH GORG FOUR-GORG! HUMANS WILL GIVE ME BAD INFORMATION AT THEIR PERIL!' He didn't look like a principal. He looked like something Hercules ought to be wrestling on the side of a vase. ↗

— Adam Rex

#humor #anger

Fucking hell.” He sighed dramatically. “I hate you, Beckstrom.” “Hold on to that,” I said. “You know, because anger will get you there. ↗

— Devon Monk

#anger

I stood up in a flash and flushed a light shade of furious. ↗

— J.L. McCoy

#humor #vampire #anger