#humor

It’s clearly a budget. It’s got lots of numbers in it. ↗

— George W. Bush

#money #presidency #humor

Last night somebody broke into my apartment and replaced everything with exact duplicates... When I pointed it out to my roommate, he said, "Do I know you? ↗

— Steven Wright

#humor

Good humor may be said to be one of the very best articles of dress one can wear in society. ↗

— William Makepeace Thackeray

#good-humor #society #humor

...There's an -or- in -whore- because you always have a choice to respect your body and say no. ↗

— Libba Bray

#sexuality #whore #beauty

I like to see the glass as half full, hopefully of jack daniels. ↗

— Darynda Jones

#drinking #humor #optimism #humor

Humor is the first of the gifts to perish in a foreign tongue. ↗

— Virginia Woolf

#foreign #gifts #humor #perish #tongue

I regard the writing of humor as a supreme artistic challenge. ↗

— Herman Wouk

#challenge #humor #i #regard #supreme

To laugh or cry is the most beautiful thing in the world ↗

— Roberto Benigni

#life #beauty

Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time. ↗

— Steven Wright

#distance #everywhere #time #walking #within

It's hard to force creativity and humor. ↗

— Al Yankovic

#force #hard #humor