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#humor

Read through the most famous quotes by topic #humor




Then you're aping him. Valentine was one of the most arrogant and disrespectful men I've ever met. I suppose he brought you up to be just like him." "Yes," Jace said, unable to help himself, "I was trained to be an evil mastermind from a young age. Pulling the wings off flies, poisoning the earth's water supply — I was covering that stuff in kindergarten. I guess we're all just lucky my father faked his own death before he got to the raping and pillaging part of my education, or no one would be safe. ↗


— Cassandra Clare


#jace-wayland #age

The Little Boy and the Old Man Said the little boy, "Sometimes I drop my spoon." Said the old man, "I do that too." The little boy whispered, "I wet my pants." I do that too," laughed the little old man. Said the little boy, "I often cry." The old man nodded, "So do I." But worst of all," said the boy, "it seems Grown-ups don't pay attention to me." And he felt the warmth of a wrinkled old hand. I know what you mean," said the little old man. ↗


— Shel Silverstein


#old-age #poetry #youth #age

You and I have a love so secret that not even you know about it. But first, let me introduce myself. ↗


— Jarod Kintz


#funny #humor #love #ridiculous #age

You think sex is dirty. You have a dirty mind. ↗


— Christopher Pike


#humor

The only drink I like ice in is water, because you can’t water down water. I’m like that with love, too. Don’t you dare add any ice to the hot liquid loving I’m trying to pour all over you. ↗


— Jarod Kintz


#drink #funny #hot #humor #ice

Crazy was a river you just floated along on. - KC Klein ↗


— Valerie Bowman


#humor

I bet you cook good, huh?" Darlene asked. "Mother doesn't cook," Ignatius said dogmatically. "She burns. ↗


— John Kennedy Toole


#humor #humor

From the ages of 8-18, me and my family moved around a lot. Mostly we would just stretch, but occasionally one of us would actually get up to go to the fridge. ↗


— Jarod Kintz


#family #funny #growing-up #humor #laziness

Have a day when you wish you could vomit words, but can only dry heave. ↗


— Brick Marlin


#humor

Do you write novels?" I said. "Novels, Lord no," she said. "I can't even stay married. ↗


— Pam Houston


#commitment #humor #writing #art






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