#humorous

Much slower, I turned around to see Vlad examining his fingernails, as if his hands weren't still ablaze in the flames that had blasted the ghoul's head off moments before. 'what the hell was that?' I gasped. 'Premature inflammation,' He replied. 'Happens sometimes. Very embarrassing, I don't like to talk about it.' ↗

— Jeaniene Frost

#humor

I can be a regular bitch. Just try me. ↗

— Stieg Larsson

#humor

I have no clue. I have ovaries; therefore, I repel all things mechanical. ↗

— M. Leighton

#humor

Just so you know, I hate camping. I'm not so much appreciating the fact that there's no bathroom out here. 'Nature calls' while walking in nature is on my list of least favorite things. You tigers, and men in general, have it so much easier than us girls. ↗

— Colleen Houck

#humor

She shrugged and flipped her glossy hair behind her shoulders. "What else do you have to do with your time besides think about stuff like this? It's not like you're real heavy into extracurriculars. Besides, you're all, like, goth and into the dead, right?" Alona Dare, queen of the insult-compliment. "Wow. Thanks. Anyone ever tell you you're good with people?" She frowned. "No." "Good. I'm not goth." "Your hair is black, you have piercings, you wear black all the time and act all freaky-" "My hair is naturally this color. I have three earings in one ear, that's it. This shirt" -I tugged at the fabric across my chest- "is navy blue, and if I act weird all the time, it's because of ghosts like you. ↗

— Stacey Kade

#humor

I was cold, hungry, and in a hole in the ground. But at least I had my elven porn, damnit! ↗

— Kim Harrison

#humor

Mother said we had reached the Age of Reason and had to be good now. We must have because we wanted Willy Starr instead. ↗

— Marie Clair

#age

You could have heard a bee fluff ↗

— S.W. Lothian

#humorous #middle-age #age

That's a good attitude. You should hate me more, curse me more, and detest me! Then you should take the power of that hatred and use it to survive this rotten world. ↗

— Sorachi Hideaki

#humorous #life #manga #sarcasm #strength

Jericho stopped him before he left. He slid the ring off his finger and handed it to him. "Take this." Asmodeus curled his lip as he shrank back from it. "I'm not about to marry your ugly ass, boy. No offense, but you ain't my type. I like my dates with less body hair... and with female parts attached by nature." Jericho let out an aggravated growl. "It's not a wedding ring, asshole. It's Berith's ring. You get into trouble you can summon him to help you get out of there." That completely changed his attitude. "Oh, hey, that could be worth an engagement to you." Asmodeus grinned as he palmed it. "If I'm back in a few hours... well, I don't want to think about that. I might change my mind about doing this. I'm thinking happy thoughts. Creamed dog innards and rotten steak. Yeah. Yum." He vanished. ↗

— Sherrilyn Kenyon

#humor #humorous #attitude