#humorous

She would thump them both, and she would apologize to neither. ↗

— Kristin Cashore

#humor

I like stories about supervillains. They teach children that you can accomplish great things even when the whole world is against you. ↗

— G.D. Falksen

#humor #humorous #inspirational #pulp-fiction #steampunk

His question is pretty dangerous for me to try to answer, so I don’t—it continues to hang out there like the stained underwear at a slumber party that goes unclaimed. ↗

— Jen Naumann

#humorous-quotations #ya #young-adult-fiction #zombies #life

I've always worried a lot. And frankly I'm good at it." The late Erma Bombeck, one of the funniest women ever. ↗

— Catherine Robertson

#life

I love fortune readings! because when I get in troubles, if the reading says that I am in a lucky day, I can think my troubles are just some kind of mistakes, and if the reading says that I am in the unlucky day, I can think that my troubles are just because of my bad luck. Either ways, I can know the reason of my troubles. ↗

— Hiroko Sakai

#fortune-telling #funny #horoscope #humorous #life

نصحته النصيحة الوحيدة الممكنة: تزوج.. لن تجهد بعد هذا في تذكر أين أمضيت ليلتك لأن زوجتك ستعرف.. لن تتساءل عن سبب تعاستك لأن زوجتك ستعرف.. الخلاصة أن كل مشاكلك المعنوية البلهاء ستتحول إلى كوارث مادية محترمة.. تذكر كيف كانوا قديما يعالجون مرضى الفصام بحقنهم بجراثيم الملاريا! ↗

— أحمد خالد توفيق

#marriage #humor

He’s an even-tempered stallion. What he lacks in stamina he makes up for in speed, kind of like most of the men I’ve slept with. ↗

— Lila Shaw

#naughty-humor #men

Well,' said Mrs. Erdleigh, speaking kindly, as if to a child who has proposed a game inevitably associated with the breakage of china, 'I know trouble will come of it if we do. ↗

— Anthony Powell

#music

Science and discovery, especially in the field of non-abnormal pediatric mysteries, is built on the work of those who have been sneezed on before us. Causation and rationale may someday be reached, but until then it is the heartwarming and parental nature of the journey that drives us on; well, that and a fresh box of Kleenex. ↗

— Spuds Crawford

#humorous-quotes #parenting #nature

Life plots elegantly. ↗

— Alice Randall

#humor