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#humour

Read through the most famous quotes by topic #humour




Did you ever hear one of those corny, positive messages on someone's answering machine? 'Hi, it's a great day and I'm out enjoying it right now. I hope you are too. The thought for the day is share the love. Beep.' 'Uh, yeah, this is the VD clinic… speaking of being positive, your test is back. Stop sharing the love. ↗


— Andy Rooney


#love

All I had to say to anyone that doubted our love was, "Eat your knickers!". ↗


— Tyne O'Connell


#humourous #love #sayings #love

The word “future” and females is a dangerous combination. ↗


— Chetan Bhagat


#marriage

Thou art hunger, yo. Make with the starvation. ↗


— Jackie Morse Kessler


#art

She nodded, grabbed her purse out of the drawer and skedaddled, walking like she was on a catwalk, one foot in front of the other, her ass swaying under the skirt of her expensive, tailored suit. Bitch. I thought again, watching her go. “No comparison,” Luke said after the door closed behind Dawn and I turned to him. “Excuse me?” “Dawn’s a man eater. You’re not. No comparison,” Luke answered and I didn’t know how to take that. “Is that good?” The half-smile came back. “Most men prefer to do the eating.” Holy fucking cow. ↗


— Kristen Ashley


#humourous #romance #men

The problem is, God gave man a brain and a penis and only enough blood to run one at a time. ↗


— Robin P. Williams


#men #men

Look at all the things that can go wrong for men. There’s the nothing-happening-at-all problem, the too-much-happening-too-soon problem, the dismal-droop-after-a-promising-beginning problem; there’s the size-doesn’t-matter-except-in-my-case problem, the failing-to-deliver-the-goods problem…and what do women have to worry about? A handful of cellulite? Join the club. A spot of I-wonder-how-I-rank? Ditto. ↗


— Nick Hornby


#hornby #humor #humour #man #manliness

Susan hardly had begun to slow down when Tera appeared from between a couple of buildings and loped over to the car. I leaned forward, opened the door, and she got into the backseat. I threw her the extra clothes I had picked up, and she began to dress without comment. It worked," I said. "We did it." Of course it worked," Tera said. "Men are foolish. They will stare at anything female and naked. ↗


— Jim Butcher


#men #sex #women #men

That's part of your curse. To drive men mad with desire and feel no pleasure". "Great," I muttered. "And all this time I thought I was frigid. ↗


— Kristina Douglas


#men

If he were a man of strong mind, it only gave him fits; but a person of mere average intellect it usually sent mad. ↗


— Jerome K. Jerome


#humour #learning #music #men






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