#humour

...You'd think the little part about them supposedly killing us would be the attention getter. ↗

— James Dashner

#the-scorch-trials-humour #trials

I can tell you that she's not breathing,” he said. “She has no heartbeat and all organ function and brain activity have stopped. Also her body temperature is now at seventy-three degrees.” “So you’re saying that she’s dead,” I said. “Well, I can't prove it, but, yes, I am leaning that way. ↗

— John Zakour

#sci-fi #sci-fi-humour-comedy #sci-fi

How bad is it?” “The story is only just now being reported, but let's put it this way,” HARV said. “The bag is now clearly catless, and there’s a very foul odor coming from the fan. ↗

— John Zakour

#sci-fi #sci-fi-humour-comedy #sci-fi

People used to say obvious things ironically or as a form of understatement, but in the last few decades they seem to say it with a sense of discovery, and it worries me. ↗

— Kevin Hearne

#discovery

America is a land where a citizen will cross the ocean to fight for democracy - and wont cross the street to vote in a national election. ↗

— Bill Vaughn

#elections

The only thing worse than fighting a giant scorpion was fighting a giant scorpion who was trying to protect her young. ↗

— Suzanne Collins

#motherhood #motherhood

So Beckendorf was pretty popular?" Leo asked. "I mean-before he blew up? ↗

— Rick Riordan

#mythology #percy-jackson #mythology

Have you tried talking to her?" "No, we've been punching her repeatedly in the face instead. Why, do you think that won't work? ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#jace-wayland #sarcasm #simon-lewis #sarcasm

Then the syncretist Ficino, sitting hunched with Lorenzo standing at his side, put all the ideas together, along with Lorenzo's new song: chariots blazing between the worlds as gods fought rebel gods, the destruction of a city -- a planet? -- by fire, beasts beyond imagining both to terrify and befriend the heroes. "It needs a title," Signorina Scala said. Pulci had his mouth open, but Ficino beat him to the pun. "It shall be dedicated to Isis and Mars," he said, "and we will call it Stella Martis. ↗

— John M. Ford

#john-m-ford #star-wars #the-dragon-waiting #imagination

If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? ↗

— George Carlin

#humour #paradox #humor