#k

I know I want to have children while my parents are still young enough to take care of them. ↗

— Rita Rudner

#children #enough #i #know #parents

I love to write jokes and that's all I think about. ↗

— Rita Rudner

#i #i love #i think #jokes #love

They usually have two tellers in my local bank, except when it's very busy, when they have one. ↗

— Rita Rudner

#busy #except #local #two #usually

We men are fascinated by the things we don't really understand. It gives us something to think and talk about: like females, they drive us nuts. ↗

— Criss Jami

#attraction #conversation #curiosity #fascination #females

I started taking ballet lessons when I was 4, and I was performing in ballet companies when I was 10, and I did summer stock in Miami Beach when I was 12, and finally I said, 'I gotta go to Broadway.' ↗

— Rita Rudner

#beach #broadway #companies #did #finally

If I say a joke and the audience laughs it makes me feel good. ↗

— Rita Rudner

#feel #feel good #good #i #joke

It wasn't that no one asked me to the prom, it was that no one would tell me where it was. ↗

— Rita Rudner

#me #prom #tell #where #would

My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to. ↗

— Rita Rudner

#boyfriend #broke #get #get married #him

My mother's mother is a very tough cookie. She buried three husbands. Two of them were just napping. ↗

— Rita Rudner

#cookie #husbands #just #mother #napping

My Vegas act is how I make my money. ↗

— Rita Rudner

#how #i #make #money #vegas