#nonsense

I talked to a calzone for fifteen minutes last night before I realized it was just an introverted pizza. I wish all my acquaintances were so tasty.
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— Jarod Kintz

#alone #calzone #communicate #communication #desperation

I want to go to Martha’s Vineyard. I have an aunt named Martha. And an uncle by that name. Neither one is related to me. 
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— Jarod Kintz

#family #martha #martha-s-vineyard #name #nonsense

I will never buy a fish tank, because I don't believe in supporting the funding of aquatic war machines. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#fish-tank #funny #nonsense #pacifism #funny

The tire left a skid mark on the road that looked like a mustache. So I shaved it off the pavement, stuffed it in my trunk, and took it home to wear to work the next day. Ah, but that’s life, no?
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— Jarod Kintz

#day #life #mustache #nonsense #pavement

That was the first time ever in history that anybody got Special Guest Star. I started that whole nonsense. ↗

— Jonathan Harris

#ever #first #first time #got #guest

I love to talk about nothing. It's the only thing I know anything about. ↗

— Oscar Wilde

#nothing #talk #love

I can tie a cherry stem into a knot with my tongue. Now, if only I could do the same with my shoelaces, I wouldn’t have to banana pudding my way to success.
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— Jarod Kintz

#bizarre #cherry #knot #nonsense #ridiculous

If we listened to our intellect, we'd never have a love affair. We'd never have a friendship. We'd never go into business, because we'd be cynical. Well, that's nonsense. You've got to jump off cliffs all the time and build your wings on the way down. ↗

— Ray Bradbury

#affair #because #build #business #cliffs

Any acceleration constitutes progress, Miss Glory. Nature had no understanding of the modern rate of work. From a technical standpoint the whole of childhood is pure nonsense. Simply wasted time. An untenable waste of time. ↗

— Karel Capek

#any #childhood #constitutes #glory #had

Many of us saw religion as harmless nonsense. Beliefs might lack all supporting evidence but, we thought, if people needed a crutch for consolation, where's the harm? September 11th changed all that. ↗

— Richard Dawkins

#changed #consolation #crutch #evidence #harm