#salesman

Love will find you eventually, I guarantee it. That’s why you need to buy an invisible cloak from me for the one-time low price of $77,777.77. Offer valid for emotional invalids only. 
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#emotions #guarantee #invalid #invisibility #invisible-cloak

There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman? ↗

— Woody Allen

#evening #ever #insurance #life #salesman

My wife - to-be and I went to see my father. Only he could answer the two questions before us: Shall we get married now? Shall I begin the practice of law, or continue being the successful wine salesman I had become, working my way through law school? ↗

— Emanuel Celler

#become #before #begin #being #continue

The book salesman should be honored because he brings to our attention, as a rule, the very books we need most and neglect most. ↗

— Confucius

#because #book #books #brings #honored

Miller didn't write Death of a Salesman. He released it. It was there inside him, waiting to be turned loose. That's the measure of its merit. ↗

— Elia Kazan

#him #inside #loose #measure #merit

I thought at the time that I wanted to go into institutional sales, selling stocks and bonds to institutions. In those days, which was the 1960s, the institutional salesman was making about $100,000 a year. I thought that was just an enormous amount of money. ↗

— Henry Kravis

#amount #bonds #days #enormous #go

I never got to call myself a door-to-door salesman, because, regrettably, I only ever went to one door. But one day I just might knock on another door, to be able to proudly say that I was once a door-to-door salesman. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#funny #humor #pride #salesman #funny

I am a travelling salesman. I deal in ideas. ↗

— Martin Kippenberger

#deal #i #i am #ideas #salesman

We have a product for sale called news, and I'm a salesman. ↗

— Shepard Smith

#i #news #product #sale #salesman

Before I sold used cars, I sold used horses. Mostly to glue factories. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#factories #funny #horses #humor #sales