#vagina

-Good thing you don’t own a mirror, Mr. Mirrorless, or you’d see how ugly you are.
 -What makes you think I don’t own a mirror? Every face that ever looks at me tells me that I’m ugly. But every time I make them laugh, I get to show them what beauty really is.
 -I see what you mean. Here, take my rearview mirror. I don’t need to carry it around like a vagina on a rope anymore.
 -Mr. Thrustsalone, you don’t need to drag a vagina on a rope like some kind of pet on a leash to make you happy. There’s a reason why God invented right hands and hookers.
 -Why, so politicians could have more productive ways to spend their time and our money than engaging in politics?
 -Mr. Thrustsalone, you are wise beyond your years.
 -I’m 88 years old.
 -Yet you don’t look a day older than 87. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#dialogue #face #laugh #laughter #meaning

The clitoris is pure in purpose. It is the only organ in the body designed purely for pleasure. ↗

— Eve Ensler

#clitoris #pleasure #vagina #design

What do you think I imagine making love to a vagina would be like? Maybe like having sex with a ballroom! ↗

— John Irving

#vagina #imagination

... The desecration of women indicated the failure of human beings to honor and protect life and that this failing would, if we did not correct it, be the end of us all. p. xxxii ↗

— Eve Ensler

#life

What did the zombie say to the whore? Keep the tip! ↗

— Diana Rowland

#vaginal-fantasy #zombies #life

The heart is capable of sacrifice. So is the vagina. The heart is able to forgive and repair. It can change it's shape to let us in. It can expand to let us out. So can the vagina. It can ache for us and stretch for us, die for us and bleed and bleed us into this difficult, wondrous world. So can the vagina. I was there in the room. I remeber. ↗

— Eve Ensler

#heart #life #vagina #women #change

Can you tell by where my eyes are looking what I’m thinking? Hint: I’m staring directly at your vagina.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#hint #men #naughty #naughty-thoughts #obvious

I didn’t hear words that were accurate, much less prideful. For example, I never once heard the word clitoris. It would be years before I learned that females possessed the only organ in the human body with no function than to feel pleasure. (If such an organ were unique to the male body, can you imagine how much we would hear about it—and what it would be used to justify?) ↗

— Gloria Steinem

#body-acceptance #body-appreciation #clitoris #female #male

I’m only saying what you won’t. He’s a hunk, admit it. A tall, dark, exotic hunk who wants to bed you, and you must be a fucking nun, because it’s been three weeks since you met him and you’re going to have to remove the cobwebs from your vagina with forceps soon, they’re growing into intelligent life form— ↗

— Dianna Hardy

#cobwebs #dating #humor #humour #relationships

If we happened to be in rehearsal downstairs in my room and a neighbor padded across the lawn to rap gently on the window and ask us to please be more quiet, Natalie might simply lift up her skirt and mash her vagina against the window while extending her middle finger. ↗

— Augusten Burroughs

#humor #hysterical #vagina #humor