#z

Sometimes... the first step to forgiveness is realizing that the other person... is batshit crazy. ↗

— Michelle Bartlett

#forgiveness #humor #forgiveness

Memory is a crazy woman that hoards colored rags and throws away food. ↗

— Austin O'Malley

#irrationality #memory #food

When we neglect our Bible study we often feel guilty. When you skip a meal do you feel guilty? No, you feel hungry. The Bible is food for our soul. When we fail to read it we should not feel guilty, we should feel hungry. Guilt is fueled by obligation hunger is fueled by desire. ↗

— Tyler Edwards

#desire #hunger #jesus #zombie #food

It was as if we'd only been gone the weekend. Or had we been gone a lifetime. Part of that was because when you've lived in Alaska, living in other places seems easier, less challenging, less threatening. Alaska had enlarged each of us. No one is ever the same after coming back from Alaska. ↗

— Peter Jenkins

#god #milk-booze-and-lightning #travel #whole-food #food

Today, the rich are the haves and the poor are the have-nots. Tomorrow, the rich will be the have-food and the poor will be the have-not food. ↗

— Bill Gaede

#end-of-man #extinction #globalization #last-generation #mass-extinction

When she offered me a spot of tea, I said, “No thanks, I’ve already got a spot of tea on my shirt.”
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— Jarod Kintz

#funny #hospitality #humor #random #random-thought

Is there a gun that shoots rain? Oh yeah, water guns. How technologically advanced we are!
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— Jarod Kintz

#civilization #civilized #culture #funny #gun

When someone says so-and-so’s opinionated, what’s that mean? Aren’t we all opinionated? Show me one person with no opinions, and I’ll show you a bowl of Jell-O—or a politician, whichever one’s dumber.
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— Jarod Kintz

#funny #humor #politicians #politics #random

Every sex noise can be converted into a note and frozen in a can of soda. Ask me about menstruation music today! 
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— Jarod Kintz

#convert #drink #frozen #funny #humor

My shadow falling over a spot of land always increases its real estate value. Buy it now, because at high noon, all value will vanish.
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— Jarod Kintz

#funny #humor #noon #random #random-thought