Egoist Confessions

I'm unemployed and because I am lazy I cancelled college. Now I live at home again, my parents pay for me and I just spend their money on useless stuff or booze. I party almost every weekend, I get drunk and pay drinks for the ladies.
I beg for money and lend money from my friends. But I don't think about giving it back, occasionally they'll forget.
Well the biggest problem is not the begging and the laziness, it's simply that I can't care for myself... that bothers me.

#laziness   #unemployed   #money   #parents   #begging   #lending   #friends   #egoist  

Every tuesday is pizza day in my office. This means our boss buys pizza for the whole office. Because my office is in the fifth floor and the cafeteria is in the first floor, I often have difficulties getting a slice of pizza. Some of my stupid and egoistic colleagues always take half or the whole pizza and disappear in their offices. The entire staff gets 5 to 8 pizzas. We are 32 people.

So today, I waited for the pizza man and put laxatives on each pizza before leaving them in the cafeteria.
Hahaha, what a fun. The entire third floor was blocking the restrooms for the rest of the day.

#pizza   #laxative   #office   #staff   #egoistic   #revenge   #confession