Robert Orben

I remember when humor was gentle pokes. I used to call it 'arm around the shoulder' humor. Now they go for the jugular and they take no prisoners. It's mean, mean stuff. ↗

— Robert Orben

#around #call #gentle #go #humor

Planned obsolescence is not really a new concept. God used it with people. ↗

— Robert Orben

#god #new #obsolescence #people #planned

The chance to be seen as a warm, witty guy is too good an opportunity for a politician to miss. ↗

— Robert Orben

#good #guy #miss #opportunity #politician

The secret of writing comedy is to know where it's all going, then get ahead of it. ↗

— Robert Orben

#comedy #get #going #know #secret

What bothers me about TV is that it tends to take our minds off our minds. ↗

— Robert Orben

#bothers #me #minds #off #our

With my luck, if I ever invested in General Motors, they'd bust it to Corporal! ↗

— Robert Orben

#corporal #ever #general #general motors #i

A graduation ceremony is an event where the commencement speaker tells thousands of students dressed in identical caps and gowns that 'individuality' is the key to success. ↗

— Robert Orben

#caps #ceremony #commencement #dressed #event

Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work. ↗

— Robert Orben

#america #day #every #every day #forbes

Never raise your hand to your children - it leaves your midsection unprotected. ↗

— Robert Orben

#children #hand #leaves #never #raise

Life was a lot simpler when what we honored was father and mother rather than all major credit cards. ↗

— Robert Orben

#cards #credit #credit cards #father #honored